"Holding onto anger is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die"
I love this. It's so true, and you can swap out anger for bitterness, resentment, hatred or pretty much any negative emotion.
Recently someone hurt my feelings, someone close to me. I've been angry about it for a few days, I could confront them but I know I'd get one of two responses. Either they'd be defensive/angry, or would take a very negative view of themselves which would require me to contradict them to make them feel better about themselves. Neither of which would do me any good.
I'm pretty sure they're totally oblivious about how their actions have impacted on me. There's absolutely no malice behind it, it's a sin of omission rather than an intentional act. It's not the first by a long stretch, it's not even new, nor will it be the last.
So I have a few choices. I can cut this person out of my life, which isn't going to happen - I love them very much. I can tell them how I feel. I've already discounted the option of telling them.
I've decided I'm not going to continue to hold onto it, but I'm not going to put myself out for them until I feel things have balanced out, it's what I need to do to reduce my irritation and frankly, they don't deserve it. I'm not going to actively hold onto my negative feelings about it, it doesn't do me any good at all. Being the grown up sucks big hairy balls sometimes - ultimately though it's the best thing for me.
Machinations of a creative mind
Tuesday, 8 March 2016
Saturday, 9 January 2016
Scooptastic!
As some might know, I tend to make truffles as gifts at Christmas, and I use a small metal scoop to try and get them nice and even and professional looking. I managed to break it this year (note to self, micro the truffle centre mix for 10 seconds before trying to make it into balls), so ordered another from ebay, without checking the size guestimating it to be 4cm. So it arrives, but it's 5cm. And it should have been 3cm anyway but that's by the by. So I message them and explain it's the wrong size according to their description so they send out another one. It's exactly the same as the first, yes, it's 5cm. I write again, and they apologise and refund me. So I head off to Amazon where I buy what's described as a medium, 3cm scoop. It turns up, and lo and behold it's exactly the same as the two I've already got, even down to the packaging. I send them a message, and they kindly offer me a 30% refund to keep it. Thanks. But no. I get a refund. So, I'm now up 3 scoops (1 of which I gave to a baking friend as part of her Christmas presents), in addition to the 1 I already had. And no 3cm scoop.
So the search continues. I know they exist. I had one....
So the search continues. I know they exist. I had one....
Saturday, 12 December 2015
Fruit salad and the coeliac
There's a really interesting discussion going on over on the Coeliacs Eat Out Board on Facebook at the moment about the dreaded 'fruit salad only offering' you get when eating out at some restaurants and hotels. And why it's such an issue. It happened to me a short time ago and I couldn't really put into words why it was such a big deal to me and why such a silly thing is upsetting. Everyone's responses have helped clarify it:
1. You don't go to a restaurant to have things you can easily make at home (well I don't),
2. Fruit salad isn't a treat in the way a dessert is supposed to be (same goes for ice cream or sorbet),
3. You're paying good money to eat out and only having one option makes you feel cheated when everyone else gets to tuck into cakes etc,
4. You have to accept it or be prepared to make a fuss, drawing unwanted attention to yourself and the fact you're different,
5. It's a reminder that you've got coeliac disease and that you have to manage it every day at every meal, and that you have to plan ahead, negotiate, discuss and hopefully then get something nice agreed and that what you've been promised actually turns up when it's supposed to. Consequently it leads to anxiety.
6. It happens a lot. The effect is cumulative.
It's not a choice, this gluten free diet, it's not something we can opt in and out of, a little gluten will do us harm we're not just following a fad to be difficult. If you're still with me through all of that, you might wonder how much gluten it takes to make a coeliac sick. The smallest amount of gluten which has been shown by a biopsy to cause damage to a celiac is 0.1 gram per day (Catassi et al.). This is approximately the amount of gluten contained in 1/48th of a slice of bread. About a thumbnail's worth.
1. You don't go to a restaurant to have things you can easily make at home (well I don't),
2. Fruit salad isn't a treat in the way a dessert is supposed to be (same goes for ice cream or sorbet),
3. You're paying good money to eat out and only having one option makes you feel cheated when everyone else gets to tuck into cakes etc,
4. You have to accept it or be prepared to make a fuss, drawing unwanted attention to yourself and the fact you're different,
5. It's a reminder that you've got coeliac disease and that you have to manage it every day at every meal, and that you have to plan ahead, negotiate, discuss and hopefully then get something nice agreed and that what you've been promised actually turns up when it's supposed to. Consequently it leads to anxiety.
6. It happens a lot. The effect is cumulative.
It's not a choice, this gluten free diet, it's not something we can opt in and out of, a little gluten will do us harm we're not just following a fad to be difficult. If you're still with me through all of that, you might wonder how much gluten it takes to make a coeliac sick. The smallest amount of gluten which has been shown by a biopsy to cause damage to a celiac is 0.1 gram per day (Catassi et al.). This is approximately the amount of gluten contained in 1/48th of a slice of bread. About a thumbnail's worth.
Friday, 13 February 2015
The Fifty Shades of Grey Film - What a ride!
It felt like we'd been waiting to see it for ages, and here it finally was, Fifty Shades of Grey on the big screen.
There was a loud and audible moan of disappointment when the film ended, due to frustration of being in the story and having it end rather than because it was bad. I think that's an excellent indicator overall of the reception of the very large crowd that saw the film this evening at Vue Lakeside.
It was hot, no question. I'd be happy to have more hotness but it certainly wasn't a cop out, it was a good snapshot of the book - like all these things you never get ever aspect of a book in the film. There just isn't time, as it was I think the running time was about 2 pretty engrossing hours.
The two actors did a good job. From the first trailer I'd thought that Dakota Johnson might have not been able to carry it off but she was a really convincing Anastasia. The 12 year old immature sniggers from the audience were irritating in places (people, it's just sex). It was (intentionally) laugh out loud in several places and made me rethink aspects of the story and want to read it again. It reinforced the fact that whilst the book is an erotic novel, there's plenty of story in there, of emotion and depth, pain, discovery and a whole host of other layers. It's not just about the shagging.
Fifty shades is not a catastrophe as some reviews have described it, I liked it. I'd not claim it as great and worthy cinema but I really enjoyed it, I'd see it again - actually not would, definitely will, and I'm looking forward to the blu(e) ray release. One gripe - again the double standard on nudity, female nudity is still seen as much more acceptable than male, hopefully this will change in 2 and 3. Sorry Jamie but we want to see your man parts, we really, really do.
It follows the structure of the books so far, so this film ends where book 1 does (hence the ooooohhhs) - hopefully that's not too much of a spoiler. Now off to google what's been said about the next two. And have a suspiciously early night.
PS Jamie Dornans bottom is AWESOME. Seriously lickable.
PPS I don't recommend you watch it with your Mum.
There was a loud and audible moan of disappointment when the film ended, due to frustration of being in the story and having it end rather than because it was bad. I think that's an excellent indicator overall of the reception of the very large crowd that saw the film this evening at Vue Lakeside.
It was hot, no question. I'd be happy to have more hotness but it certainly wasn't a cop out, it was a good snapshot of the book - like all these things you never get ever aspect of a book in the film. There just isn't time, as it was I think the running time was about 2 pretty engrossing hours.
The two actors did a good job. From the first trailer I'd thought that Dakota Johnson might have not been able to carry it off but she was a really convincing Anastasia. The 12 year old immature sniggers from the audience were irritating in places (people, it's just sex). It was (intentionally) laugh out loud in several places and made me rethink aspects of the story and want to read it again. It reinforced the fact that whilst the book is an erotic novel, there's plenty of story in there, of emotion and depth, pain, discovery and a whole host of other layers. It's not just about the shagging.
Fifty shades is not a catastrophe as some reviews have described it, I liked it. I'd not claim it as great and worthy cinema but I really enjoyed it, I'd see it again - actually not would, definitely will, and I'm looking forward to the blu(e) ray release. One gripe - again the double standard on nudity, female nudity is still seen as much more acceptable than male, hopefully this will change in 2 and 3. Sorry Jamie but we want to see your man parts, we really, really do.
It follows the structure of the books so far, so this film ends where book 1 does (hence the ooooohhhs) - hopefully that's not too much of a spoiler. Now off to google what's been said about the next two. And have a suspiciously early night.
PS Jamie Dornans bottom is AWESOME. Seriously lickable.
PPS I don't recommend you watch it with your Mum.
Friday, 30 January 2015
Eating Gluten Free in Prague
I'm just back from a three night stay in Prague, it's a beautiful city and I can't recommend it enough for a city break. Eastern European food though is notorious for being wheat based, with lots of dumplings, wheat thickened stews etc. so I did plenty of research before we went and found some real gems. It's worth taking some basic snacks though if you want to hang out in traditional Czech cafes.
Gluten free is clearly extending out across Europe, I didn't find it particularly hard to eat out whilst there, well, no harder than it is anywhere new.
Firstly, the hotel we stayed in - The Best Western Majestic Plaza offered me GF rolls and cornflakes with the breakfast that was included in our stay. They advised which dishes on the buffet were safe and when the mushrooms weren't one day due to a sauce they were in, they offered and made me a fresh, safe dish of them of my own. They had a really wide selection of stuff, cheeses, sliced sausage, eggs, bacon, fruit, yoghurts. It was excellent. They also tailored meals in their restaurant to suit, and I had a bar snack of baked Camembert with GF bread for dipping.
If, like me, you go to a country and want to try regional dishes, Svejk U Karla restaurant has a full menu of things that you wouldn't normally get, like dumplings, pancakes, apple strudels, the menu was extensive and the prices very reasonable. It's the only 'normal' restaurant I've ever been to where the first menu I was offered without asking was the gluten free one. The potato dumplings were fantastic.
I came across two bakeries that had big, gluten free crossed grain signs in the window and Bez Lepku (Gluten Free) clearly displayed. One is on the Old Town Square and is called Pekarstvi v Dusni. I found part baked bread, biscuits, muffins and cake there. The prices again were a lot less than we pay here (two muffins, some biscuits and two part baked seeded baguettes was about £3.50). The second is Libeřské lahůdky at 9 Vodickova, nearish to Wencleslas Square. I just saw the sign in the window and didn't have time to go in so can't report on what they had for sale.
Our first lunch, at the recommendation of a friend, was at The Bake Shop. It's an upscale deli selling soup, sandwiches, salads and cakes. They were able to do a salad for me with GF bread. I didn't sample any of the biscuits, they were alongside lots of other 'normal' stuff and I didn't want to risk it.
I didn't see any GF products in Starbucks unfortunately. There are plenty of McDonalds around though if you get caught out.
Other places that offer GF menus below, I haven't tried any of these places myself.
Hotel U Prince - this is on the Old Town Square
Cafe Imperial
Little Whale - looks more expensive than many Prague Restaurants
Pizza Coloseum - GF pizza bases and pasta
Triton Restaurant - on Wencleslas Square with an amazing looking cave stalactite ceiling
Another bakery -
Diana Svet Oríšku at Vocelova 606, Praha 2 and other locations - fresh gluten free bread on a Monday
Hope that helps you, and do visit Prague, it's a beautiful city stuffed full of amazing architecture and history.
Gluten free is clearly extending out across Europe, I didn't find it particularly hard to eat out whilst there, well, no harder than it is anywhere new.
Firstly, the hotel we stayed in - The Best Western Majestic Plaza offered me GF rolls and cornflakes with the breakfast that was included in our stay. They advised which dishes on the buffet were safe and when the mushrooms weren't one day due to a sauce they were in, they offered and made me a fresh, safe dish of them of my own. They had a really wide selection of stuff, cheeses, sliced sausage, eggs, bacon, fruit, yoghurts. It was excellent. They also tailored meals in their restaurant to suit, and I had a bar snack of baked Camembert with GF bread for dipping.
If, like me, you go to a country and want to try regional dishes, Svejk U Karla restaurant has a full menu of things that you wouldn't normally get, like dumplings, pancakes, apple strudels, the menu was extensive and the prices very reasonable. It's the only 'normal' restaurant I've ever been to where the first menu I was offered without asking was the gluten free one. The potato dumplings were fantastic.
I came across two bakeries that had big, gluten free crossed grain signs in the window and Bez Lepku (Gluten Free) clearly displayed. One is on the Old Town Square and is called Pekarstvi v Dusni. I found part baked bread, biscuits, muffins and cake there. The prices again were a lot less than we pay here (two muffins, some biscuits and two part baked seeded baguettes was about £3.50). The second is Libeřské lahůdky at 9 Vodickova, nearish to Wencleslas Square. I just saw the sign in the window and didn't have time to go in so can't report on what they had for sale.
Our first lunch, at the recommendation of a friend, was at The Bake Shop. It's an upscale deli selling soup, sandwiches, salads and cakes. They were able to do a salad for me with GF bread. I didn't sample any of the biscuits, they were alongside lots of other 'normal' stuff and I didn't want to risk it.
I didn't see any GF products in Starbucks unfortunately. There are plenty of McDonalds around though if you get caught out.
Other places that offer GF menus below, I haven't tried any of these places myself.
Hotel U Prince - this is on the Old Town Square
Cafe Imperial
Little Whale - looks more expensive than many Prague Restaurants
Pizza Coloseum - GF pizza bases and pasta
Triton Restaurant - on Wencleslas Square with an amazing looking cave stalactite ceiling
Another bakery -
Diana Svet Oríšku at Vocelova 606, Praha 2 and other locations - fresh gluten free bread on a Monday
Hope that helps you, and do visit Prague, it's a beautiful city stuffed full of amazing architecture and history.
Tuesday, 30 December 2014
Christmas recipes
Well now that the dust has settled I wanted to do a post of the recipes and things I made over the festive period so I can remember for next year.
Firstly, cranberry sauce. Yes, you can buy this and there are some lovely ones but I love it and it's so easy to make and just so much better than shop bought stuff. Even my brother waxes lyrical about this and he doesn't do waxing. You know what I mean.
Cranberry Lushness
200g cranberries
170g sugar (caster or granulated)
Juice and zest of one clementine or satsuma
Port
Water
Juice the clementine into a jug, and top up the liquid to 2oz with port. Then add in 2oz of water.
Add that mix to the cranberries along with the sugar and zest in a saucepan.
Bring to a rolling boil and cook for approximately 5 mins, you'll know when the mixture becomes thick and syrupy, some of the cranberries will still be whole but most should be a delicious, jammy mush.
Allow to cool and store in the fridge.
I did turkey and ham, with the following glaze which I will be making again it was fantastic, both on the ham and drizzled over when cold.
Morello Cherry Glaze
1 jar of morello cherry conserve (not jam, you want one with a high fruit content)
1 tspn heaped of mixed spice
2 tblsps dark muscovado
Mix the ingredients and warm in a saucepan until they are well combined.
Cook your ham as per the instructions/your preference.
30 mins before the end of cooking removed the skin and as much or little fat from the ham as you wish
Pour over glaze coating the ham well, but don't use all of it just enough to provide cover.
Put in the oven for 15 mins at 180c for a fan oven, 200c for a non fan version.
Remove and pour over more glaze, return for another 15 mins.
Serve hot or cold with remaining glaze.
I'll post some more stuff but those two were the ones I really wanted to set down for future use.
Firstly, cranberry sauce. Yes, you can buy this and there are some lovely ones but I love it and it's so easy to make and just so much better than shop bought stuff. Even my brother waxes lyrical about this and he doesn't do waxing. You know what I mean.
Cranberry Lushness
200g cranberries
170g sugar (caster or granulated)
Juice and zest of one clementine or satsuma
Port
Water
Juice the clementine into a jug, and top up the liquid to 2oz with port. Then add in 2oz of water.
Add that mix to the cranberries along with the sugar and zest in a saucepan.
Bring to a rolling boil and cook for approximately 5 mins, you'll know when the mixture becomes thick and syrupy, some of the cranberries will still be whole but most should be a delicious, jammy mush.
Allow to cool and store in the fridge.
I did turkey and ham, with the following glaze which I will be making again it was fantastic, both on the ham and drizzled over when cold.
Morello Cherry Glaze
1 jar of morello cherry conserve (not jam, you want one with a high fruit content)
1 tspn heaped of mixed spice
2 tblsps dark muscovado
Mix the ingredients and warm in a saucepan until they are well combined.
Cook your ham as per the instructions/your preference.
30 mins before the end of cooking removed the skin and as much or little fat from the ham as you wish
Pour over glaze coating the ham well, but don't use all of it just enough to provide cover.
Put in the oven for 15 mins at 180c for a fan oven, 200c for a non fan version.
Remove and pour over more glaze, return for another 15 mins.
Serve hot or cold with remaining glaze.
I'll post some more stuff but those two were the ones I really wanted to set down for future use.
Sunday, 16 November 2014
The middle bit before the storm
I've not blogged much after a few weeks of social busyness.
I had my lovely friend Alan to stay, and cooked him shredded lamb shoulder in redcurrant and mint jus. Normally it's a dish I do with lamb shanks but since they've become fashionable they're really expensive, with two coming in at over £10. Shoulder is a much cheaper option (a less than £8 joint easily feeding 5) and works extremely well cooked over shallots, carrots in a very low oven or slow cooker. We're talking about 6 hours here, until it falls apart when you stick a fork in it.
The added benefit of this is once the meat is stripped from the bones, you can reduce the cooking sauces (containing mint sauce and redcurrant jelly) and have a delicious jus, which you can put the meat back into. At this point it can happily sit in the fridge and just needs warming through when you need it. It also freezes well (I had some this evening with rapid roastini and cauliflower).
We had some lovely drives out, including discovering a lovely beach in Shoeburyness where people were walking their dogs.
The halloween party was good, though exhausting. I was pleased with how it turned out and I made meatball eyeballs (went down very well), pumpkin cheese scones, cocktail sausages with a honey mustard dip, coffin chocolate cake, cheesecake dip with bagel chips, brazillian cheese balls, M&S party snack skewery things and nuts and crisps. There was some left over which meant that I didn't have to cook for a few days and I was very grateful for that.
Yesterday we took a trip out to Polhill Garden Centre at Badgers Mount. I was pleased to see they'd got some gluten free snacks this time in the cafe, last time they had nothing suitable. Lovely christmas displays finished off with a Toby Carvery with parsnips! Wahey!
I had my lovely friend Alan to stay, and cooked him shredded lamb shoulder in redcurrant and mint jus. Normally it's a dish I do with lamb shanks but since they've become fashionable they're really expensive, with two coming in at over £10. Shoulder is a much cheaper option (a less than £8 joint easily feeding 5) and works extremely well cooked over shallots, carrots in a very low oven or slow cooker. We're talking about 6 hours here, until it falls apart when you stick a fork in it.
The added benefit of this is once the meat is stripped from the bones, you can reduce the cooking sauces (containing mint sauce and redcurrant jelly) and have a delicious jus, which you can put the meat back into. At this point it can happily sit in the fridge and just needs warming through when you need it. It also freezes well (I had some this evening with rapid roastini and cauliflower).
We had some lovely drives out, including discovering a lovely beach in Shoeburyness where people were walking their dogs.
The halloween party was good, though exhausting. I was pleased with how it turned out and I made meatball eyeballs (went down very well), pumpkin cheese scones, cocktail sausages with a honey mustard dip, coffin chocolate cake, cheesecake dip with bagel chips, brazillian cheese balls, M&S party snack skewery things and nuts and crisps. There was some left over which meant that I didn't have to cook for a few days and I was very grateful for that.
Yesterday we took a trip out to Polhill Garden Centre at Badgers Mount. I was pleased to see they'd got some gluten free snacks this time in the cafe, last time they had nothing suitable. Lovely christmas displays finished off with a Toby Carvery with parsnips! Wahey!
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